No pictures today. No recipes, no gardening tips, no museum outings. I’m just sitting here with my thoughts – and thought I’d share them here with you.
I took Chelsea to the airport last night – she left for Paris for a month-long study abroad program with her university. We’d been planning and preparing for this trip for many months, yet in a flash it seemed like I was hugging and kissing her good-bye, leaving her in a sea of other long-haired, fashionable young women.
I’ve always found it a little creepy being in an airport at night. So this didn’t help my frame of mind as I walked back to my car alone. I’m usually pretty adept at assessing my emotions but I can only describe how I felt as numb. Fuzzy. Disconnected.
And then, on the drive home, this song came on. And I was instantly transported to the months that Chelsea and I spent, almost four years ago, taking road trips to visit the colleges she was considering applying to. I had just found out (much to my surprise) that I was pregnant. Having a 16 and 11-year-old at the time (and with absolutely no intentions of having a third), I was still reeling from this news, and would continue to be for many months. But for now, I had to focus on these visits and the pursuant application process. Chelsea needed me.
One of our most memorable trips was to a college in a small, rural town in Pennsylvania. We spent a few days there so that Chelsea could attend the open house and sit in on a class or two. As the nearest shopping and restaurants were a good 20-30 minute car ride from our hotel, we spent a lot of time in the car. We were quite obsessed with the movie “Juno” (which, unbeknownst to Chelsea, was having particular meaning for me), and played the soundtrack incessantly. When “All the Young Dudes” would come on we would blast it and sing at the top of our lungs. We also spent a lot of our time together talking about her hopes and dreams for her college experience, and in particular, her wish to study abroad.
And now here she was, about to embark on that very experience we talked about, what seemed like an eternity ago.
The song snapped me out of my fog – I turned up the volume and sang at the top of my lungs.
When I came home I found it hard to get out of the car, as if I was going to lose the moment somehow. But I did. And there was Noah – covered with tomato sauce and telling me he missed me (I was gone for all of three hours). I gave him a big hug and looked at him, marvelling at the fact that he had no clue (or care) of what I was feeling.
He needed me.
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Hi! I'm Sheri!
Welcome to my little corner of the web where you’ll find easy, delicious recipes, the best kitchen hacks and simple tips for turning your home into a clean haven that is free of toxins. So glad you’re here!
Once again, your writing has brought tears to my eyes and a lump in my throat. Thank you for sharing how fortunate we are/can be to watch “our young dudes” grow and soar and there for us to love.
who better than you my friend – thank you. xoxo
I love how God whispers encouragement to us, often in the form of music : ) Well, that’s how I like to think of it, anyway. Hope your daughter has a life-changing experience abroad. You are such a good mom!
I often feel that there’s a whole soundtrack playing in my head! Thank you so, so much!
Oh, this takes me back…my college freshman son did a month in Germany as an exchange student when he was 15. What an amazing experience this will be for your daughter but oh, what a trip for you!
Indeed- thanks so much for writing – you nailed it! 🙂
Sheri – This is such a beautiful post! I had tears rolling down my face as I read it. You’re such a talented and gifted writer. Thanks for sharing. Happy New Year!
Thank you SO much – comments like this mean the world to me – I hope you know that. And Happy New Year to you too! 🙂
THIS was an amazing post, Sheri. Such an interesting snapshot at what is means to be a parent of a teen {I cannot yet fathom this} and a toddler. And also of the bond between a mom and her daughter – she’s a lucky girl!
Thank you so much Tracy – I feel like I’M the lucky one!!
Beautiful. Just lovely. XO
Thank you so much………..
This reminds me how fast my girls are growing, and that they are growing away. Which probably wasn’t the point of this point, but I’m maudlin tonight.
Also, I am a huge life soundtrack person. So many songs bring me back. Mott the Hoople especially.
Beautiful writing and slice of lifedness.
Thank you so much for this! I was maudlin too – I think what confuses me the most is, why? These are the exact moments you pray for, work for, as a parent. So yes, that WAS the point – I appreciate your saying that! Love that you’re a “soundtrack” person too (makes me feel less crazy!). Many thanks for taking the time to write! 🙂